Question Jokes:

How does a rogue kill a paladin?
He pickpockets his Hearthstone.

How many Dwarves does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.

What do newbs and rogues have in common?
They both pick locks.

How many pints does it take to get a Dwarf drunk?
Just find one who is sober and we'll start counting!

What does the warrior say to the mage?
Trick Question. The Mage is dead.

Unanswered question of the week #1
What happens when the Unstoppable Force hits the Immovable Object?

Unanswered question of the week #2
How many warlocks can a murlock stunlock if a murlock could stunlock warlocks?

How many rogues does it take to stunlock you indefinitely?
Just one.

How does a Tauren hide in the barrens?
He paints his nuts red and pretends to be an apple tree.
How do most Gnomes die?
Picking apples.

A Tauren is standing in a river, surrounded by 20 Gnome mages that specialise in Frost Magic. How will he get out?
Wet and cold.






"You play WoW too much..." - Jokes:

You know, you play WoW too much when...
... your microwave goes "Ding!" and you say "Gratz!".
... you only go to church for a stam buff.
... my warlock, when I cast Drain Life on you, it says: "Warning! Target has no life!"
... when you turn 18 and you go looking for your trainer.
... you're waiting in line for a ride and yell: "LAG!"






"Your mother..." - Jokes

Your mother's so fat, ...
... I tried to shadowstep her and got disconnected.
... Chain Lightning hits her three times.
... she fell off her Wind Rider on her way to Silithus and created the Un'Goro Crater.
... at level 20 she gets the Aspect of the Whale.
... she can tank. And she's a mage.
... she takes up 5 slots in a raid group.
... she scares Illidan who goes yelling: "I am not prepared!"
... she's the reason why the Dark Poral is so big.
... when I target her it says: "You may only have one target at a time."
... Warlocks have to use 2 Soulshards to summon her.
... when she runs down the Street, she casts 15 Thunder Claps.






Other Jokes:

A Dwarven pirate walks into the Salty Sailor tavern with a steering wheel in his pants.
Inkeeper: "Oi mate, ya have a steerin' wheel in yar pants!"
Dwarf: "Arrrr, I know, it's drivin me' nuts!"

Van Cleef had been surrounded by the police, but he managed to escape.
Chief: "Didn't I tell you to place a guard at each exit?"
Officer: "But that's what I did!"
Chief: "Then how did he get away?"
Officer: "Through the entrance!"

A blonde mage Human was spending with her mount on the roads in Elwynn Forest when a blonde female paladin cop pulls her over.
Mage: "What's the problem ma'am?"
Cop: "You were speeding, it's only allowed to drive at 200% max here, you were going 250%. I'll be needing your driver license."
The mage starts searching her purse looking very confused.
After a while:
Cop: "It's something small with your picture on it."
The blonde mage, as stupid as she is, pulls out her make-up mirror.
Mage: "Here you go ma'am."
The cop looks at it.
Cop: "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't knew you were a cop also, please proceed."

An Orc wakls into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.
A nearby human looks at the Orc.
Human: "Where did you get that thing?"
The parrot looks at the Human.
Parrot: "They're all over Durotar."

A Tauren walks into a bar.
Bartender: "Why the long face?"

Nessingway and Nessingway Jr are lying on the ground after a hard days hunting.
Nessingway looks up. He turns his head to his son.
Nessingway: "What do you see, son?"
Nessingway Jr: "Well, I see hundreds of planets and beyond that lie the unknow mysteries of space."
Nessingwary ashamed at his sons foolishness.
Nessingway: "Yes... and what does that mean?"
Nessingway Jr: "Well, I suppose in theory that means, that there are endless possibilities for intellgent life out there... right?"
Nessingway becames angry.
Nessingway: "NO YOU BLOODY FOOL, THAT MEANS SOMEONE HAS STOLEN THE TENT!"

A Tauren warrior, a Blood Elf priest and a Forsaken warlock are captured by the Alliance during a raid.
All are sentenced to the "march of death".
They are token to Tanaris, striped down to a lion cloth and told that they must make their way across the desert to Gadgetzan.
If they die, so be it, if they lived, the ordeal of the trek would be their punishment.
As a least request, each is given a choice of one food item to carry.
Tauren: "I'll take a watermelon. I can drink it's juice and then eat it to sustain me through the journey."
Blood Elf: "I'll take a coconut. It's lighter than a watermelon and will sustain me just the same."
The Forsaken looks for a moment at the other two.
Forsaken: "Can I just have a fork?"

A Dwarf walks out of a bar.

A Gnome, Night Elf, Dwarf and Human are all sitting together in a bar think of ways to bring honor to their cities.
The Human, thinking long and hard.
Human: "Why don't we jump off the great lift for our cities and honor them with our sacrifice?"
The rest think, this is a great idea and off they go.
When they reach the lift, the Human says he'll go first since it was his idea, so he steps up to the edge.
Human: "For Stormwind!"
And then, he jumps off to his death.
The Night Elf decides he will go next and steps up tho the edge.
Night Elf: "For Darnassus!"
And then, he jumps off to his death.
The Dwarf, working up his courage asks the Gnome to tell him how far down the fall is.
The Gnome walks up to the edge and looks down.
The Dwarf, suddenly:
Dwarf: "For Ironforge!"
Then the Dwarf kiks the Gnome off.

This "Jesus" guy is getting so terrible lag, it took him 3 days to respawn!

The Doctor called me and said, that I only have 6 months left to live.
Me: "That's terrible! Isn't there anything I can do?"
Doctor: "Well, you can get a WoW Account and farm reputation in Silithus."
Me: "Will that help?"
Doctor: "No, but it'll be the longest 6 months you've ever lived."

A Human paladin, a Dwarven warrior and a Night Elf priest walk into the Goldshire Tavern.
Shortly after, all are seated by the bar maid.
The Human and the Dwarf both order a tall frosty mug of ale, the pristess a glass of wine.
Then, they begin to talk about their next dungeon to explore.
The bar maid brings out their drinks and to the surprise of the party, each drink has a dead fly floating upright in their drinks.
The Pristess looks at the glass in disgust, throws it over the shoulder and storms out of the tavern.
The Human casually shrugs, flicks the fly our of his mug and begins to drink.
The Dwarf's eyes light up in a furious rage and he violently plucks the fly from his mug and starts squeezing the lifeless bug over the mug.
He screamed:
Dwarf:"SPIT IT OUT! SPIT IT BACK OUT!"

Two Tauren are standing in a padaock.
Tauren #1: "Moo."
The other Tauren became angry.
Tauren #2: "Bastard! I was gonna say that!"

A Gnome walks into a bar, looking rather distraught.
Gnome: "Any hunters in here with an enormous, 15-foot bear waiting outside?"
A Dwarf at the bar looks up.
Dwarf:"Yea, that's Scratchy waiting outside, he doesn't like to go into bars. Why, did he try to swipe at you?"
Gnome: "No no no, Thing is, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but my mechanical squirrel just killed it."
Dwarf: "That can't be right! Scratchy is 15 feet long and could just step on some squirrel! I refuse to believe some squirrel killed my bear!"
Gnome: "Fine, don't believe me. Just go outside and look. There's a 15-foot dead bear outside with my squirrel stuck in his throat!"

hehe.. nice.^^

Ist mal bisschen was Neues dabei, nicht so die Standard-Dinger, die man immer so hört :)